Thursday, March 14, 2024

Blog Tour: HAPPILY NEVER AFTER by Lynn Painter

 

Their name? The objectors.

Their job? To break off weddings as hired.
Their dilemma? They might just be in love with each other.

When Sophie Steinbeck finds out just before her wedding that her fiancé has cheated yet again, she desperately wants to call it off. But because her future father-in-law is her dad’s cutthroat boss, she doesn’t want to be the one to do it. Her savior comes in the form of a professional objector, whose purpose is to show up at weddings and proclaim the words no couple (usually) wants to hear at their wedding: “I object!”

     During anti-wedding festivities that night, Sophie learns more about Max the Objector’s job. It makes perfect sense to her: he saves people from wasting their lives, from hurting each other. He’s a modern-day hero. And Sophie wants in.

     Max and Sophie start working together, the two love cynics going from wedding to wedding, and she’s having more fun than she’s had in ages. Sophie looks forward to every nerve-racking ceremony, where she gets to save the lovesick souls of the betrothed masses. As they spend more time together, however, they realize their physical chemistry is off the charts, leading them to dabble in a little hookup session or two—but it’s totally fine because they definitely do not have feelings for each other. Love doesn’t exist, after all.

     And then everything changes. A groom-to-be hires Sophie to object, but his fiancée is the woman who broke Max’s heart. As Max wrestles with whether he can be a party to her getting hurt, Sophie grapples with the sudden realization that she may have fallen hard for her partner in crime.

 

CHRISTY'S REVIEW

Happily Never After was such a fun, easy-to-read romance. I loved the friends-to-lovers/fake dating aspect and the banter between Sophie and Max. 

Sophie and Max meet at Sophie’s wedding where he’s an objector. It’s a bit of a side job and much needed for Sophie. She’s so thankful for Max’s help and with time they become friends. Sophie wants in on the ‘objectors’ gig and they become a team. They also find hanging out beneficial for Sophie’s job and getting Max’s parents off his back. 

With all this time they spend together, it’s normal that feelings start to happen. The problem is Sophie doesn’t believe in love. Can Max change her mind? This one had me chuckling and smiling more times than I can count. Max and Sophie had great chemistry and an even greater friendship. And her roommate/bestie Larry made the book for me. Such a fun read!

LYNN PAINTER- AUTHOR 

Lynn Painter lives in Omaha, Nebraska, with her husband and pack of wild kids. She is a community columnist for the Omaha World-Herald, as well as a regular blogger for their parenting section. When she isn’t reading or writing, she can be found eating her feelings and shotgunning cans of Red Bull. Learn more online at www.lynnpainter.com.
*Lynn Painter’s author photo credited to Heather Hall Photography

HAPPILY NEVER AFTER Excerpt 


Sophie

The moment my dad raised my veil, kissed my cheek, and handed me off to Stuart, I wanted to throw up.

No-first, I wanted to punch my groom right in his besotted smile.

Then I wanted to vomit.

Instead, I took his arm and grinned back at him like a good bride.

The pastor started speaking, launching into his cookie-cutter TED talk about true love, and my heart was racing as I waited. I swear I could feel four hundred sets of eyes burning into the back of my Jacqueline Firkins wedding gown as I heard nothing but the sound of my panicked pulse pounding through my veins and reverberating in my eardrums.

Was he already there, seated among the guests? Was he going to burst through the doors, yelling?

And-God-what if he was a no-show?

The photographer, kneeling just to my right, took a photo of my face as I listened to Pastor Pete's love lies, so I turned up my lips and attempted to project bridal joy.

"You look so nervous," Stuart whispered, giving me a small smile.

I honestly don't know how I didn't throat-punch him at that moment.

"Welcome, loved ones," the pastor said, beaming at the congregation as he spoke. "We are gathered here today to join together Sophie and Stuart in holy matrimony."

I felt my breath hitch, unsteady, as he kept yammering, leading us closer to the moment. Something about the twinkling lights and evergreen boughs that we'd painstakingly selected for our December wedding felt garish to me all of a sudden, as if the hobo ghost from Polar Express was going to show up in the back of the church and mock me for my foolishness.

And he wouldn't be wrong.

Oh, please, oh, please, oh, please, I thought, panic tightening my chest. With every word the pastor spoke, my anxiety grew.

Stuart squeezed my trembling hand, the ever-supportive fiancé, and I squeezed back hard enough to make him look at me in surprise.

"Should anyone present know of any reason that this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your-"

"I do."

A collective gasp shot through the large chapel, and when I turned around, the man standing up was not at all what I expected. He was big and tall and impeccably dressed: charcoal suit, white shirt, gray tie, and matching pocket square. He looked like Henry Cavill's stunt double or something, but with darker hair and more intense eyes.

Honestly, I'd imagined he would be a party bro, like Vince Vaughn in Wedding Crashers, but this man looked more like he belonged in a boardroom.

"So sorry to interrupt," he said in a smooth, deep voice, "but these two should absolutely not be married."

"Who is that?" Stuart hissed, daring to give me an accusing stare as a low rumble of whispers emanated from the pews.

"Oh, she doesn't know me, Stuart," the man said, looking a hundred percent comfortable in his uncomfortable role. He raised one dark eyebrow and added, "But my friend Becca knows you."

I gasped, my response entirely authentic even though I'd actually practiced it beforehand. I'd known this man was coming, but I hadn't expected him to be so . . .

Good.

The man was good. The way he spoke made me feel just as shocked as I'd been two nights ago, when I'd discovered Stuart's Becca on his phone.

"Listen, pal, I don't know-"

"Stuart. Shut up." The man looked down at his wrist and straightened his cuff, as if the mere sight of Stuart bored him. "The lovely Sophie deserves so much more than a cheater for a husband. I would imagine most of us here know it isn't the first time; wasn't there a Chloe last year?"

"I don't know who you are, but this is bullshit." Stuart's face was red as he glared at the man, and then his darting eyes came back to me. I looked at his face, remembering how it'd looked when he'd sobbingly begged my forgiveness over his Chloe transgression, and he actually had the gall to say to me, "You know it's not true, right?"

My gut burned as he feigned innocence and I said, "How would I know that? Isn't Becca the name of the girl who texted you in the middle of the night, and you said it was a wrong number?"

"It was a wrong number," he said with wild eyes. "This guy is obviously trying to ruin our day, and you're letting him, Soph."

"Then give me your phone," I said calmly, and Pastor Pete pulled at his collar.

"What?" Stuart's flushed face twisted, and he glanced at the congregation as though looking for backup.

"If you have nothing to hide," the objector said, still standing and talking in that deep, steady voice like this whole scenario was completely normal. "Just give her the phone, Stuart."

"That's it, fucker!" Stuart yelled, rushing toward the guy. All hell broke loose as his groomsmen followed, though it was unclear if they were trying to hold him back or incite the forthcoming brawl.

It was a cacophony of male yelling and gray tuxedos in motion.

His mother yelled, "Stuart, no!"

Just as Stuart punched the objector square in the face.

"Oh, my God," I said to no one in particular, watching in disbelief as the objector took the punch without his body moving, as if he hadn't even felt it.

Stuart's father looked right at me as he loudly muttered, "Jesus Christ."

And Pastor Pete apparently forgot that his lapel mic was on, because he sighed and said, "Are you fucking kidding me?"


Excerpted from Happily Never After by Lynn Painter Copyright © 2024 by Lynn Painter. Excerpted by permission of Berkley. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.






Monday, February 12, 2024

Blog Tour: The Catch by Amy Lea

 

A grumpy lobster fisherman tosses a fashion influencer’s impeccably curated life overboard in the next romantic comedy from international bestselling author Amy Lea.

In a last-ditch effort to rescue her brand from the brink of irrelevance, Boston fashion influencer Melanie Karlsen finds herself in a rural fishing village on the east coast of Canada. The only thing scarier than nature itself? The burly and bearded B and B owner and fisherman, Evan Whaler—who single-handedly disproves the theory that Canadians are “nice.”

     After a boating accident lands Evan unconscious in the hospital, Mel is mistaken for his fiancée by his welcoming yet quirky family, who are embroiled in a long-standing feud over the B and B. In a bold attempt to mend family fences, Mel agrees to fake their engagement for one week in exchange for Evan’s help with her social media content.

     Amid long hikes and campfire chats, reeling in their budding feelings for each other proves more difficult by the day. But is Mel willing to sacrifice her picture-perfect life in the city for a chance at a true, unfiltered love in the wild?


Christy's Review:


I have been a fan of Amy Lea’s ‘The Influencer’ series from the start, and though The Catch wasn’t my favorite of the three (Exes and O’s is by far the best imo) it was still enjoyable overall.

Melanie is a different kind of influencer than her two best friends. The kind you think of when influencers come to mind. Highly edited photos, fashion, travel, etc. She is sort of at a crossroads with her career and goes out of the country to review a resort, but not everything goes to plan.

Mel ends up at an only partially operational AirBnB run by two cousins, Lucy and Evan. Evan is a grumpy fisherman but there are sparks between him and Mel, even if neither wants to admit it. Evan was the best part of this book. I adored him. And his entire family. The fake dating was fun, but some of the third-act stuff made me eye-roll some.

The ending of this book was bittersweet. I was happy with how things turned out for this couple, but I’ll miss these characters!

Excerpt: 

“Put me down! My underwear is showing,” I demand as a gust of wind hits my ass cheeks. At least I’m wearing a cute lace thong.

“Rest assured, I’m not looking,” he mutters as I flail like an eel the entire ascent up the staircase. He doesn’t put me down until we’re outside my bedroom.

“I’m taking a star off your Airbnb review for manhandling,” I warn as he attempts to steady me against the wall just as Lucy passes by with a mini garbage can.

“Double bagged. Just in case. Looks like she might need it,” she says, giving Evan a troubled look as she turns to get out of my vicinity. “Sorry, I’m out. I don’t do puke. Night, guys.”

“I won’t puke. I’m feeling fan-tas-tic!” I shout after her with unfounded confidence. I push the door open the tiniest crack, revealing the disaster I left my room in. My cheeks flush with embarrassment. I’m a secret slob—someone who looks neat and tidy to others but is most comfortable in my own chaos (when no one’s looking).

“I can take it from here,” I assure Evan, righting myself.

His expression is quizzical. “No. You can barely stand.”

“I’m great. You can retire to your underground candlelit lair now.” I take an eager stride into my room, which to me was pretty smooth, but apparently I’m useless.

He leads me to the bench at the foot of the bed, where I proceed to topple face-first into the mattress, legs spread like a mannequin. The compromising position isn’t lost on me.

“I feel the need to warn you, I have some pretty lethal hair spray. Just as effective as bear mace, according to Cosmo,” I say, voice muffled by the mattress.

“What are you gonna do? Blind me with it?” he asks, bending over to retrieve it from under the bed.

“If you try anything, I’ll have no choice.”

“You don’t have to worry about that, Mel.” He softens his tone considerably, which is comforting. I’m pretty sure this is the first time he’s ever referred to me by name.

Any lingering appreciation is short lived when he jabs my shoulder without an ounce of delicacy. I must have drifted out of consciousness for a minute or two, because when I open my eyes again, Evan is placing a garbage bin next to me.

“It’s right beside the bed if you need it,” he says slowly, like I’m a small child. “Do you need me to ask Lucy to help you change? A glass of water?”

“No. I’m perfectly fine,” I mumble, flopping over onto my side. He’s weirdly attractive from a horizontal perspective, and I don’t like it one bit.

He watches me for a couple of peaceful breaths before abruptly pivoting on his heel. “This is going in your Airbnb guest review, by the way.”

I glare at him, blowing at the hair stuck to my lip gloss. “The intoxication? Or my veiled threat?”

“Both. Mostly the drunk part. I did warn you about the Screech,” he reminds me, hands flexing at his sides.

“It wasn’t the Screech. Your friends were the ones pouring shots down my throat. Who am I to deny Canadian hospi-taly?”

He cocks his head. “Hospitality, you mean. And you’re wasted.”

“Perfectly sober,” I mumble, sliding under the covers without taking my shoes off.

“Wears shoes in bed. Another star off,” he mutters.

“Mean host. One and a half stars off,” I retort, squeezing my eyes shut when the room starts to spin.

“Scratched the shit out of me with those claws. Minus two stars,” he says, pretending to rub a hand over his shoulder. I definitely scratched him while holding on for dear life as he hauled me up the stairs.

“Hey, I paid a lot for these nails.”

Despite my questionable eyesight in my current state, I’m pretty sure I catch his lips draw upward into the tiniest smile before my eyes close.

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Excerpted from The Catch by Amy Lea Copyright © 2024 by Amy Lea. Excerpted by permission of Berkley. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.


About the Author: 


Amy Lea is the international bestselling author of romantic comedies for adults and teens, including Mindy Kaling’s Book Studio selection Woke Up Like This. Her acclaimed works have been featured in USA Today, Entertainment Weekly, Cosmopolitan, Elle Magazine and has been long listed as a CBC Canada Reads finalist. They have also been optioned for film and sold to over a dozen foreign territories.

When Amy is not writing, she can be found fan-girling over other romance books on Instagram (@amyleabooks), eating potato chips with reckless abandon, and snuggling with her husband and two goldendoodles in Ottawa, Canada.

  • Author photo credited to: Amy Lea

Tuesday, February 6, 2024

5 Stars for BRIDE by Ali Hazelwood

 


Misery Lark has always felt like an outsider—as the daughter of a Vampyre councilman, she’s been volun-told to sacrifice her freedom and needs for the good of her kind for her entire life. The newest sacrifice? Upholding a historic peacekeeping alliance between the Vampyres and their mortal enemies, the Weres, by entering an arranged marriage with the Alpha Were.

 

Wedding bells are ringing as Misery is whisked down the aisle to her betrothed, Lowe Moreland. Despite those broad shoulders, brooding stares, and extremely attractive looks, Lowe and Misery despise each other from the get-go. But Misery agreed to this for more than familial obligation and a white dress. Her human best friend, Serena, has been missing for weeks, and Misery has reason to believe she’s in Were territory. It’s impossible to figure out who she can—and can’t—trust…and it may take help from her newly declared “other half” to find her friend and make her heart whole once more.


Christy's 5-star Review


She’s not like he imagined. She’s more, in every possible way.

As soon as I finished reading this I knew I had just read my first five star book of the year. I forget how much I love paranormal romance until I read one and I remember they were the books that got me back into reading and reading romance. Sometimes they can be so good and passionate and all encompassing and this one was just that.

Bride was much different than Ali Hazelwood’s other books (I’ve read them all) and I was obsessed from the start. Misery is a Vampyre who is marrying a Were she’s never met, but not just any Were. The Alpha. This won’t be the first time Misery has taken one for the team for her kind, but she has a reason this time. And that is her best friend, Serena.

Marriage of convenience, fated mates, forbidden romance, this book had it all. Lowe was such an Alpha (ha) and he fell hard and fast for Misery. Misery was funny, sarcastic, and guarded at first, but once she started opening up to people, I loved watching her personality shine. I adored this couple together and so many of the secondary characters. With the way this ended, I only hope Ali writes more from this world.

Bride was fast paced, entertaining, exciting, action packed and intoxicating. I loved seeing this author step out of the contemporary romance/stem books she does so well and go a different direction. This paranormal romance was fantastic and I highly recommend it!
“Of all the good things… of all the good things I’ve felt in my life, you are the best.”





View all my reviews

BBU - Coming Soon