Breaking Nova by Jessica Sorensen
My rating: 5 of 5 stars
5 Shattered Stars!
Another Jessica Sorensen book that gave me a major case of the feels! From the moment I read the prologue, I was hooked. I went back and forth on my rating... the book wasn’t perfect, but any book that can evoke that much feeling from me gets a solid 5 stars.
How do you move on when the person you loved chose to leave you? Death is a heartbreaking thing. But when someone choses that fate, it makes it even harder to cope. Nova Reed’s boyfriend and best friend Landon took his life last year. She hasn’t been the same since. She hasn’t been living, just trying to get by as best she can. She’ll never be the same. She doesn’t understand why he left her. Being home from college in the summer is hard for Nova. She is reminded more and more of Landon when she’s home. All the memories surround her. She will forever wonder why... and if there is anything she could have done to prevent it.
I didn’t always use to think this way.
I used to have hope.
I used to believe in things.
Quinton Carter is another person who’s life has been completely changed by death. He was driving the car that crashed and took the lives of two important people to him. He should have died too. He wishes that he did. He is alive, but hasn’t been living in a long time. No matter what happened that night, he will never be able to forgive himself. He is in self destruction mode. He doesn’t feel he deserves any happiness. He does the only thing he knows how to do to cope, the only thing that even takes the edge off. He gets high. When he’s high, the pain is a little more bearable.
Nova and Quinton are both in a bad place when they meet. For some reason, whether it’s his eyes, the fact that he’s an artist... something Nova sees in Quinton draws him in. They are both broken. Death has consumed their lives.
I know death hurts, death breaks, death consumes, and there is no magic cure to making it go away.
Nova and Quinton are sort of pulled together in some strange way. It’s like they are drawn together. It’s almost like they have this mutual understanding. Nova wants to figure Quinton out. They develop this odd friendship at first. They are connected in ways that no one else would understand. The more time they spend together, the more they want to be with one another. Quinton can’t go there. He uses women all the time. But thats all it ever is. Using. Just like the drugs, something to numb him. He knows things with Nova would be different. He doesn’t want to feel anything for her, he doesn’t deserve to feel anything for her, and yet he does.
She means something. The truth stabs at my chest like a chunk of shrapnel lodged in my heart, right where the scar is. Things aren’t supposed to mean anything. I’m dead. I gave up. I’m not supposed to be here. With Nova. With anyone.
Nova and Quinton are trying to figure things out. Quinton tries to stay away, but he can’t. Their ‘relationship’ isn’t healthy. Both are damaged, broken. Instead of being able to heal each other, their lives both just spiral further and further out of control. Finally, Nova has had enough. She hits a point in her life where she knows things have to change, she has to change. But what does that mean for Quinton?
People say that time heals all wounds, and maybe they’re right.
Nova and Quinton are not perfect characters. They are both broken, flawed, damaged. I have such a love for damaged people. Nova was broken, but she hit rock bottom and rose from the ashes. I commend her for being strong enough to walk away. I hated that she had to do that, but she had to do what she had to do to survive. Get her life back on track. You can’t help anyone until you first can help yourself. Quinton was one of those characters that just broke my heart. I wanted to give him a big hug. Especially when he said things like this-
Nova said she went looking for me. No one ever goes looking for me or cared enough to worry about me. When she says it, I’m pretty certain my worthless heart shatters inside my chest, and she steals one of the pieces. If it didn’t already belong to someone else I probably would have handed her all the pieces right then and there.
There were some parts of the ending I was extremely happy with. Other parts devastated me. It is not a hea. The ending is not clean cut. There is a cliffhanger, it’s not a terrible cliffhanger, but it’s there. I really hope the next book comes out soon. I need to see what is in store for there two, especially Quinton.
“Stuff happens. We get lost. We try to control what will happen. We give up. We do things that don’t make sense. We search for things in the wrongest of ways. We lose our way, but sometimes, if we’re really, really strong, we manage to find our way back.”
I love Jessica Sorensen’s writing. It’s so fluid and beautiful. Most of her books aren’t light. She creates beautifully damaged characters who have some serious issues. It shouldn’t surprise you that this isn’t a light read. I will also say it is one of those books that won’t be for everyone. There were some seriously gritty parts. Death. Suicide. A lot of drug use. People who are doing any thing they can to erase the pain, numb themselves. If all that makes you uncomfortable or you are looking for a stand alone with a hea, this won’t be the book for you. If you are looking for an emotional, raw, powerful and beautiful book, you will want to give this one a go.
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